What Do You Really
By Lynn Bacon, CPLC, CRC, CFC
Do you know that feeling that you get when you
you need a new car, or a new pair of shoes? Sometimes people feel like they've gotten as much as they can out
of their employment and feel the need to look for a new job or just feel the need to do something wild and crazy
and go to get that tattoo they've always wanted. Then, a couple weeks later, the shoes hurt
their feet and don't match any outfits, that car is a police magnet and the tattoo looks
So, how do we know what we really want? People think that they
really want things, but what they really want is the feeling that those things give them. Try this
- pick something that you want (a thing, an experience, a change, a feeling, etc.). Now, ask
yourself "what will this give me that I wouldn't otherwise have?" For example, you want a new
outfit. What will that give you that you wouldn't otherwise have? Maybe your answer might be "to
be able to wear something new." What would that get you? Then you might respond "I'd feel
better about myself." If you keep going on this path, you will eventually come to the real answer
that will be a
(usually something like security, happiness, control or self-approval or respect). This is the feeling that
you'll have when you get what you want.
What would happen if you chose to feel it now? Can you choose to feel good about yourself? Can
you choose to feel awesome in your old t-shirt and jeans? Of course, you can! You get to
choose to feel any way you want to feel and you don't have to feel the blisters from the shoes or the regret of
getting that tattoo.
When we're looking at getting what we want in life, it happens differently than we think it will, or
"should". It's not necessarily wrong to want something new every now and then; but when we're trying to fill
voids in our lives with "stuff", we're on the wrong path to getting what we really want. When we
choose to feel the way we want to feel, we make it much easier for the things we want to
come into our lives.
Now, get out there and be AWESOME!!